Welcome to the Abiblog!

Update on Sears Charm School

2008-04-26T10:02:00.003-05:00

In case you missed it in the comments of this earlier post about the Sears Charm School, reader Stacye just sent along a great link to a recording of "interview" about the Sears School for Young Charmers from 1967...listen to it here.

They mention a tote bag to "carry your shoes" (heels), and anything else they might need to bring to class, a basic make-up kit, charm bracelet when they graduate (They have a party!), and the booklet (maybe that's the one our original Sears graduate was looking for) which "they can refer to at any time." The Charm school representatives say their students can come back at any time after their course for additional help, I guess.

Sounds like such fun! :)

R.I.P. Rose Grotke

2008-04-07T04:59:00.002-05:00

My grandma, Rose Grotke, lived to 97 and a few days. I am across the world but wish I were in Buffalo right now. I love you, Grandma. Rest in Peace.

Hello from Australia

2008-04-04T17:26:00.003-05:00

After about 32 hours of missed connections, running through LAX, and the long flights themselves, I landed in Canberra, Australia, yesterday. Now it's Saturday morning and I'm feeling a bit more refreshed after a long night's sleep. It's sunny and warm here. I'm here for a 5 day meeting starting Monday at the National Library of Australia (pictured above). Hope to walk around town today and see some sights - it's like the D.C. of Australia, federal buildings and museums. I already spotted a used bookstore. Just need to be careful not to weigh down my suitcase too much!

1902: The Ping Pong Craze!

2008-03-29T13:55:00.003-05:00

I spent the morning cheering on marathoners as they crossed the finish line of the National Marathon in D.C. I was waiting with my friend Molly for our other friend Jocelyn to finish her run (apologies if I'm not using the right marathon lingo!). Anyway, she done good and I admire her for doing such a thing. I can barely run to the bathroom, let alone down the street! Let's just say I never really learned to run or do anything much athletic thanks to the twisted Florida educational system that allowed me to take marching band instead of physical education in junior high - I guess they thought the marching counting as physical enough activity? I regret it now, but at the time I was thrilled to not have to spend an hour in the gym each day, particularly since I was shy of changing in the locker room.

So, in the spirit of physical fitness today, and all of those fabulous runners, I bring you something from a relatively new digital resource provided by my employer, the Library of Congress, and the National Endowment for the Humanities. Browsing the newspapers in Chronicling America can be a lot of fun for someone like me, particularly if you use silly keyword searches (try searching for "hair care" (just look at this example), "etiquette boys" (led me to this great page of ads), "dancing girls" gave me this result, among others). And a search on terriers (near and dear to my heart), gave me these two pages: The Society Women and her Pet Dog.

Sorry - almost forgot about to the athletics! I particularly enjoyed this page, sent to me by a friend who works on the project: The Ping Pong Girl in Training. Now that's more my style of athleticism.

Miss Abigail at the Arlington (Va.) Public Library, March 8, 2pm

2008-02-24T17:32:00.005-05:00

I'll be speaking on Saturday, March 8, at 2:00 pm at the Arlington Public Library in Virginia, in the Central LIbrary Auditorium. See the flyer.

Here's the blurb:
Arlington Writes: Miss Abigail's Time Warp Advice on Dating and Matters of the Heart

Take a step back in time as Miss Abigail shares words of wisdom from her collection of about 1,000 classic advice books in a quest to solve modern-day dilemmas. Abigail Grotke, a Library of Congress digital projects coordinator, advice blogger and historian of the art of personal guidance, has collected books from 1822 to 1978 that cover the age-old topics of dating, love, living together, marriage, health, beauty, puberty, sex, etiquette, housekeeping, home economics, and home repairs. Grotke has spent years scouting used book stores and thrift shops to locate these treasures of self help. Learn about how she's built her collection and get time-tested advice to the lovelorn. Refreshments will be served. Books will be available for sale and signing. For more information, please call 703-228-6321 or email Deirdre Cross, or see this calendar listing.

If you're in the D.C. area, please stop by!

It's not pornography -- it's etiquette!

2008-02-15T14:37:00.003-05:00

This article is great! And they are digitizing them! Can't wait.

Thanks for the tip, Jurretta!

Happy Valentine's Day! Happy Quirkyalone Day!

2008-02-14T20:48:00.002-05:00

Ah, it's the day of love and roses (for some people at least). This is the first time in a long time that I've had a valentine of my own, but my heart is still with the Quirkyalones (not just for singles, mind you!). That said, I'll try to offer a little bit for everyone today...

Digging into the Miss Abigail archives, here are some tips for:

~~ those seeking some Love Advice
~~ those trying to make love happen in a variety of ways
~~ those all alone but not necessarily minding it

That should cover it, don't you think?

Newest Old Books

2008-01-27T20:06:00.000-05:00

I've got a few new additions to the collection this month, thanks to the Library of Congress used booksale (oh, don't worry, they're not selling off the collections, staff donate books and the sales go to charities), and a visit to the DC Big Flea at Dulles Expo Center (lots of browsing yielded only two pamphlets and a tablecloth -- most things were too expensive for my taste!

The Big Flea yielded two books on play and exercise:
*The Modern Drill and Exercise Book
*Play Safe with the Games We Love

I got some great things at the LC sale, including, dig this -- the far-out Sex, Sex, Sex, which is from 1969, written by Christian husband and wife team Marcena and Trevor Wyatt Moore, who according to the back of the book, had been "practicing matrimony" for 25 years before writing this masterpiece. They "acquired, mysteriously enough, a clutch of nine children..." One rave review of the book from Father Robert F. Capon, author of Bed and Board, states: "Delightful. Whimsical. Hip. But solid. Square with round corners." That pretty much sums it up. Typography and graphics are used to engage the reader into thinking the book is hipper than it is. I was going to scan some pages in, but I've just discovered that my Adobe Photoshop Elements isn't working with the latest Mac OS (at least on my machine), so I need to figure that out before I can get some images posted for you. Sorry!

In the meantime, you can peruse all of the new books here.

Sears Discovery Charm School - ring any bells?

2008-01-20T12:10:00.000-05:00

Kelly, a fan of this site, wrote recently with a question about a book from her childhood that she's been desperately looking for -The Sears Make the Most of You Discovery Book (described a bit but without working links here. It was from a charm school that Sears ran back in the early 1970s; Kelly was a proud graduate. I sent her off to the Sears archivists but they had apparently never heard of the class or the book.

So I ask you - did anyone else out there take this class or remember this book? I'm thinking it was maybe a regional thing, but if Sears published the book... well, who knows. Post a comment if you've got any information about this class!

Thanks,
Miss Abigail

1929: Beautiful Breasts

2008-01-01T15:50:00.000-05:00

This being the first day of 2008 (hard to believe) I thought I would find something to help you with your latest new year's resolutions. I'm sure most of you have resolved to spend more time with family and friends, excercise more, eat better, to earn more money and perhaps travel to exotic locales this coming year. But I wonder, are there any women out there resolving to take better care of a part of our bodies that we often take for granted -- the breasts? The author of Lovely Ladies hopes that you will. After reading this, I think I'll try to do better by them this year.

~~
No woman can have truly womanly beauty without beautiful breasts. If illness or childbirth causes them to droop, don't allow this condition to continue for a single month. And allow no perverted current ideas to cause you to bind or strap them into a semblance of boyish flatness, and thus break down their muscles and delicate tissues.

First, the underdeveloped breasts. Simply massage them in a rotating movement five minutes night and morning, with lanolin or cocoa butter, all that they will absorb. Dust with talcum. Always mix a few drops of tincture of benzoin with lanolin or cocoa butter for whitening.

Next, breasts that sag because of illness. Watch this particularly after operations, after childbirth, and after nursing a child. They must have a massage with diluted alcohol, then a good brisk slapping with a folded towel wrung out in cold water, then the upward and rotating massage with the lanolin or cocoa butter, unless they are already very large. Never under any circumstances attempt to reduce your breasts with epsom salts or reducing creams or bandages, or rubbing contraptions which are beneficial to other parts of the body.

Continue these ministrations until your breasts are beautiful, and return to the measures if your breasts tend ever to lose that beauty.
~~

Important Disclaimer: This is originally from the 1920s, so this advice may therefore be a bit unsound. You might want to confer with your doctor before rubbing something like "tincture of benzoin" (whatever that is) or any other product that sounds funny and is probably not readily found in your local drugstore onto your chest. And hey -- don't blame Miss Abigial if your breasts burst into flame with the use of epsom salts or reducing creams. This is meant for entertainment purposes only!

Evelyn Millis Duvall

2007-12-15T16:16:00.000-05:00

As you probably are aware, the first book I ever collected in this genre is called the Art of Dating, written by Evelyn Millis Duvall. So needless to say, this book and author are pretty important to Miss Abigail.

Well, I got a nice surprise this week. Duvall's grandson was doing some searches on her name this week and happened upon my site, so he emailed me to say hello and to tell me a bit about his Grandma Duvall and the rest of the family.

Very cool! Always great to hear a bit more about the people behind these books...

1956: Are you in the know?

2007-11-19T22:02:00.001-05:00

I've been meaning to share this with you for some time, and finally had a moment to spare to scan in some photos that I know you'll just love. A little pamphlet titled Are you in the know? was given to me by my sweetie a few months back. Here's how part of the introduction reads:

"Want to make a fast exit from the department of utter confusion -- about fashions, grooming, etiquette -- poise and boys? That's why this booklet was born. To help you over the hump -- to that super-smooth dream cloud reserved for schoolebrities in the know."

Kimberly-Clark Corporation, of Kleenex and Kotex fame, were the publishers of this handy gem. The booklet accompanied an ad campaign, which is described over at the Museum of Menstruation.

For your giggling pleasure, I've scanned a few favorite pages in... click on them for a larger image.

If you like this, you'll enjoy my friend Lynn Peril's essay from years ago called Growing Up and Liking It, also posted at the MUM site.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Flickr Fun

2007-11-06T21:08:00.000-05:00

This set of scans of a 1960 home economics book are fun...

The flickr user that posted them (Millie Motts) has got a great little collection. Have a look-see of her other sets here.

Thanks Millie, whoever you are! I plan on spending a lot of time browsing...

Bad, Bad Blogger!

2007-10-21T16:20:00.000-05:00

I've been back from Norway for some time now, but you'd never know it by this blog. Oh well, life just gets in the way of the Internet sometimes.

Just before traveling I picked up some new books at The Book Thing in Baltimore, I'm in the process of adding them to my LibraryThing catalog. Will let you know when those are up. I also was given a fabulous little pamphlet called "Are you in the know? about etiquette, dating, grooming, fashions, this 'n' that," by the makers of Kotex. I need to scan some of that in, it's just too good not to share.

Promises, promises!

Hello from Norway

2007-10-04T16:35:00.000-05:00

I'm in Norway this week, of all places, for work! I'm currently in Mo I Rana, just south of the Arctic Circle, after a few days in Oslo. There's a branch of the National Library of Norway here, and the steering committee of the International Internet Preservation Consortium is meeting here, and I'm involved in all of that. But more importanly, I ate reindeer meat!

Sorry, Rudolf. It was quite tasty.

Sad news

2007-09-23T17:28:00.000-05:00

I just learned that one of my all-time favorite used bookstores, Ace Books and Antiques, is about to close. Unfortunately it's about an hour and a half away and I don't think I can get there before they go out of business. My mom and stepdad called me from Culpeper this morning after seeing a sign announcing the closing; they stopped by later and picked up a few things.

The one bit of good news is that they'll continue to be selling online through AbeBooks.com, but I'm still sad the store is going by the wayside. It was the perfect combination of great titles, great organization, and just the right amount of dirt and grime associated with a fabulous used bookstore.

I'm sorry I didn't visit more often, Ace. Thanks for the good books. :(

1881: Love Letters

2007-09-18T20:02:00.000-05:00

This week I received a lovely gift from a coworker, Gene, who was looking to lighten his bookshelves at home. Knowing I had my little obsession with advice books (he came to my Valentine's Day presentation at the Library of Congress), he so graciously gave me a book written in 1881 called National Encyclopedia of Business and Social Forms: The Laws of Etiquette &c. &c. by James D. McCabe.

Coincidentally, the book has a section on correspondence, which ties in nicely with the Post article I mentioned in my previous post.

For those of you thinking about texting a very brief note to the one you are wooing, let's take a look back at how things were done back in the 1880s, waaaay before all this technology hit. I was going to quote something from the "Love Letters" section, but this one from "Letters of Excuse" struck me as a bit more entertaining, and more appropriate for the length of a blog post. The subject for this sample letter is "To a lady, apologizing for a broken engagement."

~~
Richmond, Ind., May 10th, 1881.

My Dear Miss Lee:

Permit me to explain my failure to keep my appointment with you this evening. I was on my way to your house, with the assurance of a pleasant evening, when I unfortunately stepped upon some slippery substance, lost my footing and fell to the ground, spraining my ankle severely. I am now confined to the house in consequence of this accident.

I regret my disappointment as much as the accident, but hope that the future may afford us many pleasant meetings.

Sincerely your friend,
Albert Holliday
~~

Now, would you prefer this instead?

"sorry cant keep fun date W U this evening. but slipped and fell 2 the ground, hurt ankle. stuck @ home. sorry, try again 2MORO?"

Yeah, I didn't think so.

Love in the Age of Texting

2007-09-18T19:54:00.000-05:00

In cased you missed it, there was a fun article in the opinion section of the Washington Post this weekend called Rule of Thumbs: Love in the Age of Texting. My next post will have some advice from a time when our ancestors would have reached for the pen, instead of the keyboard or cell phone.

Handbuch für Verliebte

2007-08-21T12:38:00.000-05:00

I've just received word that Miss Abigail's Guide to Dating, Mating and Marriage will be published by Lübbe in the summer of 2008. I knew the German rights had been sold but hadn't heard anything specific until now. I'm very excited!

The title for their edition will be Handbuch für Verliebte, which translates as Manual for Lovers.

Sehr kühl!

UMass Dartmouth Alumni Magazine writeup

2007-08-15T22:37:00.000-05:00

A feature about me and the collection and site and book appeared in the Spring 2007 edition of the UMass Dartmouth alumni magazine. I did the interview back in January I think. The magazine came out in June, and their Web site recently posted it online.

UMass Dartmouth used to be called Southeastern Massachusetts University, which I ended up at after attending the Swain School of Design for a year after attending Greensboro College in N.C. for two years. Yes, my college life was a bit extended, due to some confusion on my part about that whole "what to do with your life" thing. But I guess I turned out okay.

1941: The Blossoming of Love

2007-08-07T20:05:00.000-05:00

I'm pretty much an idiot when it comes to dating (why do you think I have all of these books, anyway?), and one thing I'm still pretty awkward about is using the word boyfriend, particularly when introducing him to people. Every time I say it I giggle, for no good reason! It's horrible, I know! Maybe if I had had a boyfriend in high school I would have gotten over this earlier in life.

I tried to find some advice about this topic but didn't come up with anything directly. But this entry, from Lillian Eichler's 1941 edition of New Book of Etiquette, cuts me a little slack, don't you think? (ok, I know it's a stretch...)

~~
It is impossible for anyone to give rules and regulations for the conduct of lovers. Modern etiquette is too sensible to standardize their conduct, too sensible to attempt with rules to rob love of its joyous spontaneity, its quaint and beautiful discoveries, its impulsive tendernesses. To make rules and regulations for lovers would be like making paper patterns for flowers. It simply cannot be done.

Monsieur de la Rochefoucauld says of lovers that "All there talk is of themselves." Not only all their talk but all their thoughts are of themselves. Love is selfish, but it is a selfishness that the world generously forgives. Our one word of suggestion is that the lovers do not think so exclusively of themselves that they neglect those who, at this time, deserve a little thought and attention from them.
~~

Point taken, Ms. Eichler, point taken.

1929: Personal Hygiene

2007-08-05T17:18:00.000-05:00

Wooweee is the D.C. area hot this weekend! Even with the mid-afternoon hours wasted away napping in the central air conditioning (not even the dogs want to go outside), it's been pretty unbearable. And in the short time I did spend outside, well, I'll be honest, I've been perspiring quite a bit. What's a girl to do?

Well, this girl of course turned to the books for a little advice on personal hygiene, specifically how to "neutralize body odors." This was found in volume one of Lovely Ladies.

~~
There are so-called deodorants on the market which neutralize body odors. If you have the idea that they are injurious to you, and that by suppressing excess perspiration in a certain place it will only appear somewhere else, then use one of the powder deoderants which neutralize all body odors without in any way suppressing elimination through the pores.

Deodorants, talcum powder, astringents, mouth washes, the proper treatment of the skin areas that are too active in their functions of eliminating waste will remove all possibilities of unpleasant odors. If the area under your arms, for instance, is overactive in its eliminating functions, you can gradually and harmlessly close the pores and make them smaller and consequently less active with the use of a mild astringent after bathing. You can completely neutralize foot odors and in time quite correct any such abnormal condition by bathing them night and morning in a saturated solution of boracic acid and then dusting the powdered boracic acid into them in the place of talcum powder. Of course, you will not have to do this for longer than a week or two at the most, because after the condition is corrected just using the powdered boracic acid instead of talcum will keep them in a healthy condition.
~~

Just as a warning, I wouldn't recommend trying these treatments without doing some further research (I guess boracic acid is still used these days, but seems a bit scary to me). But still, I thought that bit about closing your pores entertaining for a hot summer day.

1966: Country Life

2007-07-28T17:39:00.000-05:00

I'm in Vermont for a few days of R&R and found a few books at a used bookshop in Brattleboro:

Lao Russell's Love; a scientific and living philosophy of love and sex;

A 1980 reprint of the 1768 The delights of wisdom concerning conjugial love: after which follow, the pleasures of insanity concerning scortatory love by Emanuel Swedenborg;

and

Sex after Forty, which could come in handy now that I'm of that age.

To give you a taste, and to follow up on the nature theme, and since I'm in Vermont enjoying it's beauty, here's an excerpt from Russell's book. It's from a little section called "Country Life."

~~
One who loves country life always feels sorry for those who have not discovered the exciting and beautiful world of Nature. No one can ever be lonely as he walks in the woods and discovers the pulsing, singing, courageous, growing trees, and the bright, glowing beauty of wild flowers--an endless array of them. Each month you discover another species. Did you know that there are actually about twenty-five kinds of chickweeds? Their little white flowers contain tiny capsules of small seeds that songbirds love.

Nature is far more exciting than odor-filled cities whose streets are filled with raucous noises, instead of the sound of the songs of birds, the rustle of leaves, falling twigs, and the "chatter" of wildlife both far and near. . . .

No life is as exciting as forest life, and yet man crowds into cities where there is tension created by man who all too often desires to build transitory wealth for his body, instead of permanent wealth for his Soul.
~~

Ah, with that, I'll head back out into the woods. I've been on the computer way too long!

R.I.P. Albert Ellis

2007-07-25T08:43:00.001-05:00

Albert Ellis, author of such classics as Sex and the Single Man and the American Sexual Tragedy, among other titles, died this week. The New York Times (registration required) had a nice obit.

1952: Are You Ready for a Hike?

2007-07-09T20:19:00.000-05:00

Well, we're certainly in the thick of summer, as is apparent here in very steamy District of Columbia Metropolitan area. And I'm sure everyone trying to figure out what to do to keep cool yet get out of the house, to enjoy a bit of nature. As Evelyn Millis Duvall writes in Love and the Facts of Life (which can be taken to heart by courting fools as well as groups of singles and married folk, I'd say) "some of the most enjoyable dates are those spent at picnics, around barbeque fires, swimming, skating, singing, playing folk games, and other such informal outings."

But such fun, informal outings aren't without danger, as William A. Evans warns us in Everyday Safety. He's a bit less cavalier than Ms. Duvall, and in addition to safety tips about swimming, boating, and building a fire, he provides these helpful hints on hiking through the woods.

~~
Hiking through the fields and woods is great fun. To enjoy a good hike it is important that you be properly dressed for the occasion. Good heavy-soled shoes are the first thing needed if you plan to walk very far. Girls should wear low-heeled shoes; to have a good time one must be comfortable, and there is less danger of turning one's ankle if low-heeled shoes are worn. Full-length trousers, slacks, or heavy stockings should be worn in order to protect the legs. The other clothing should be comfortably loose and not too heavy because the exercise keeps one warm. It is a good plan to wear a jacket or shirt with full-length sleeves in order to protect the arms.

One of the things which most frequently spoils the fun of being out in the woods or fields is infection from poison ivy, poison oak, sumac, or other kinds of weeds. Some persons seem to be immune from such poisoning while others are poisoned even by wild daisies, ragweeds, or smart weeds. There is also the danger of infection from scratches caused by briars, thorns, burrs, and splinters.
~~

If that quote didn't depress you enough, you might be interested in another from this book, on Carelessness. And if you're thinking ahead to winter, here's another from killjoy Evans.

On that note, I hope you are having a fun summer. But not too much fun! Be careful out there!